Writer leaves Commerce behind

Last week I was in class looking out the window at a car that had burst into flames on the side of the highway. This scene was the final confirmation I needed to forever think of Commerce as "Disaster City." From a shoot-out at Walmart, allegations of raw sewage being dumped in the river and the university's attempts to squash free speech, I can't wait to get out of here.

I've made the best out of the situation I was in – enough that I'll be graduating Summa Cum Laude or with highest honors in a couple weeks – but I don't know how proud I am of the place that's handing me the diploma.

I was lured here under false pretenses. I was told I would be getting a big transfer scholarship if I left the Honors College at Texas Tech University with my 4.0 GPA. Nope. As I was moving my things in I found out they just didn't have the money anymore.

I thought coming here would be the continuation of my high school relationship. It ended in a nasty breakup and the loss of all the friends I had made that first semester except for my most loyal, loving roomie Nicole. She is seriously one of the coolest, most amazing people you could ever know.

The campus looks like a recovering war zone, with its torn up walkways and a half-finished building at the front. I'm going to be kind of embarrassed when my whole family comes out here to see where I've been going to school, and that is what they'll see.

That's not to say there weren't things to be gained from my time here. I've written in previous columns about my hands-on experience and the chance I had to be a leader on campus. The East Texan staff became more of a family to me than I could ever ask for.

We stayed up late together, ate together, cursed the terrible stories that came in, hard-core danced in the parking lot, invented Shaunabrella ball, and once even protested a layout night by lying in the grass in front of the Journalism Building. We made fun of each other, everyone, and anything – nothing was sacred.

Some inside jokes to follow: I'm in my office!, do the cop kow?, must get foked, the samurai music video, I'm gonna grape ya, historical librarian – talkin' ‘bout history, pick up my poo, Lamar impressions, do we rub his nose in it?, the legit count and FOCUS! Some nicknames to follow: The Least Mexican, Bear Jew, Turd Ferguson, Silent Buffalo, Ramrod, Teegy, Staff Reports, Crazy Uncle Jared, Drug Eyes, Crazy Eyes, Chody Uggy, Thudbutt, and ole' Five Cent.

I'm lucky to have known these guys despite the university I attended. I may not know exactly where my life is going after graduation, but with my Gilbowtron at my side, I'm pretty sure anywhere away from Commerce is the right direction.

"See, this is what you're going to miss when you leave Commerce: getting hit in the head with a Nerf ball."