Opinion: Surviving holiday break is no easy task
Here we go. We're now in the final stretch of the 2010 fall semester. Are all you little freshmen out there getting excited about your first extended break from school? Yeah, I bet you are.
Well, before you start your packing for the winter break and dreaming of sugar plums or whatever, I'm here to tell you that a college student's first Christmas break will likely not be the homemade heaven that you are imagining. In all likelihood, it will probably suck – aside from all the Christmas loot, of course.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "I'm sorry Mr. Scrooge, but I have to disagree. I went home for Thanksgiving and didn't have any friction at all. It was amazing."
And to you, I say: "Shut up, listen and learn." Yeah, maybe you went home for Thanksgiving and it WAS probably amazing. Do you want to know why? It's because the three or four days that you spent with your family was not long enough for them to get sick of the newfound independence you have developed after a semester of fending for yourself at school. But this is Christmas break. We're talking about FOUR WEEKS for you and your family to annoy the crap out of one another while you count down the minutes until you get to return to Commerce and all the friends you've made here during your first semester.
But don't worry kiddies – it's not all bad news. I'm here to give you a rough timeline of your break and what you have to look forward to between the fall and spring semesters.
Week One – "All Quiet On The Western Front"
The first week of the break will generally progress pretty smoothly. You are happy to be home, have a home-cooked meal, relax from all the responsibility that has probably overwhelmed you for the past few weeks, and maybe even catch up with some of your "friends from back home." As for your family, your parents will be jumping with joy to have their "baby" back, and your siblings (if you have any) might even be happy to see you because it means that your parents' scrutiny will not be focused entirely on them while you're at home. You may even be happy to get back to work so you can make some extra money to purchase Christmas presents.
Week Two – "'Tis The Season"
Christmas usually occurs at the end of week one or at the beginning of week two, which means that any tension that may or may not have already been building will now be replaced with Christmas cheer. The glee of getting free stuff will keep everyone at ease for a little while longer. And so, all is well throughout week two.
Week Three – "Something Wicked This Way Comes"
In week three, tensions will begin to rise yet again as your parents begin to get annoyed by your new nocturnal sleep cycle. They will also likely become perturbed by your unwillingness to perform everyday chores that you used to before college, because they don't understand that you have been performing those routines all semester and don't think you should have to do them now because you are, after all, on winter BREAK. Also, by this point, you have probably realized that you have now completely outgrown your hometown friends – or vice versa – and have no desire to be around them. In addition to this, you have now worked at your job throughout the better part of your winter holiday and you are now convinced that, if one more person asks you where the "electronics" department is at Best Buy, you may just black out for several hours, during which you will violently quit your job and go on a customer killing spree that would make Jack the Ripper blush.
Week Four – "The Final Countdown"
OK, so you have one week left of your winter break – final stretch. It's at this point that I recommend you get a nice pair of around-the-ear headphones and start blasting speed metal into your brain during all hours of the day. This will hopefully drown out your parents' desperate pleas for you to just clean the moldy, used plates off of your bed, which is starting to give you that weird rash. Now is the time in which you will be thankful that you are able to start the process of moving back to school. Being able to pack will help keep your mind off the recurring dream you've been having for the last week in which your family is killed in a mugging, you get a fat inheritance and start fighting crime as a real-life Batman. Despite how you may be feeling about your break thus far, in the final moments before you leave, it is still inevitable that there will be a tearful goodbye. However, as people who have been in this situation know, these are bittersweet tears. You and your parents are a little sad that you have to go back to school, but you are both ready to get away from each other.
Remember how I said that it wasn't all bad news? I lied.
Happy [expletive deleted] Holidays!
Get Top Stories Delivered Weekly
Recent The East Texan News Articles
Discuss This Article
GET TOP STORIES DELIVERED WEEKLY
FOLLOW OUR NEWSPAPER
LATEST THE EAST TEXAN NEWS
- 'Expendables 2' epitomizes dumb but fun action
- 'The Bourne Legacy' disappoints with same old thrills
- Tasteless 'Total Recall' remake leaves audiences underwhelmed
- Actor chemistry saves 'The Watch' from being boring waste
- Batman goes out strong in final 'Dark Knight' film
- 'Ted' marks promising film career for McFarlane
- Stylistic choices sink 'Savages'
RECENT THE EAST TEXAN CLASSIFIEDS
OUTSIDE THE LINES
- Salonpas® Brand Stands the Test of Time
- Tips to “Yard Your Way” This Spring
- Upgraded Upstate Power Grid Will Deliver a Smarter,...
- A Story To Sing About
- The Gap in Gum Care: Why Caring For Your Teeth’s F...
- Top Tips for Signature Scents and Better-Smelling Laundry
- A Dog Trainer’s Top Tips to Support Pets Through Life S...
- Clear the Air of Indoor Pollutants This Spring
- Stroke & Dementia in Black Men: Tips for Staying Healthy...
- Hispanics and African Americans at Higher Risk for Eye...
FROM AROUND THE WEB
- New Expo Showcases AI Innovation
- Self-Care and Mental Health Tips for Caregivers
- Adventure Awaits: Discover the Playset that Brings...
- Need Auto Glass Repair? Don’t Despair
- Pioneering Fast and Affordable Broadband for the Underserved
- 7 Reasons Renting an RV Should Be On Every Family’s S...
- Don’t Let Diabetes Shortchange Your Golden Years
- No Child is Forgotten By Marine Toys for Tots
- Sweeten Your Springtime Salads With Healthy Chilean Grapes
- Young Author Translates 4,000-Year-Old Text to Reveal...
COLLEGE PRESS RELEASES
- Guidenar Launches New Career Test for Gen Z
- GotIt! Education Offers MathGPT Free to All State & Community Colleges
- Shoff Promotions Comic Book & Sports Card Show
- Semiconductor Research Corp unveils 2024 Research Call, $13.8M Funding
- Charles River Associates Opens Second Scholarship Cycle, Expands to the UK